


flashback

by eating_custardinbed



Series: The Internet Made Me Write It [16]
Category: IT Crowd
Genre: Angst, How fancy of me, I'm Sorry, M/M, One Shot, Short, Short One Shot, angsty, ooo look at me i have a universe, request, set in the Michael Buble universe
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-02
Updated: 2021-01-02
Packaged: 2021-03-12 14:00:33
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 933
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28511562
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/eating_custardinbed/pseuds/eating_custardinbed
Summary: roy helps moss during a flashback**set in thealways on my minduniverse**
Relationships: Maurice Moss/Roy Trenneman
Series: The Internet Made Me Write It [16]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1990789
Kudos: 9





	flashback

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Anonymous](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Anonymous/gifts).



> hallo again!! thank you to the lovely anon on tumblr who requested this!! so this is set in the _always on my mind_ universe, specifically _'everything (is what you are to me)'_ and is set between chapter 12 and chapter 13. this is going to be mean, so i'm sorry. 
> 
> please enjoy!!

When Moss screamed his name out, Roy found himself thankful that their flat was small.

He had been in the kitchen, halfway through making the two of them a cup of tea when it had happened. Immediately he had dropped what he was doing (literally dropping the kettle in the process) and sprinted back into the bedroom where he knew his boyfriend was. A million thoughts ran through his mind as he rounded the corner to the bedroom. 

Moss was sat cross-legged in the middle of the bed. Roy could see him trembling from where he was by the door. His chest was heaving and there were tears streaming down his cheeks. His glasses were sitting by the side of him. When Roy gave him a questioning look, essentially asking him what was going on, he shook his head. 

"Panic attack," he wheezed out. He reached up, wiping the tears from his cheeks. Roy came over and sat on the bed, putting his hand out onto the bed by his boyfriend. He found it best to give Moss the option to reach out to him rather than just grabbing him. That would make him panic more. "I think it's just... it's just..." 

"You're alright," Roy said gently. Moss shook his head, putting his hands into his hair behind his ears as he bent his head down. The Irishman reached forward, resting his hand on his boyfriend's thigh. "You're safe, sweetheart. I'm here." 

"I know, I just--" 

All of a sudden Moss stopped talking. Roy furrowed his brow, watching his boyfriend carefully. He'd seen Moss have panic attacks before. Since the doctor's appointment a few days ago whilst they were waiting on the prescription for the anti-anxiety meds to come through Moss had been having a particularly hard time of it. Neither of them were sure what it was, but Roy was privately theorising that someone professional telling him what it was, that it was normal for what he had gone through, had almost opened the floodgates.

Moss was completely still. He was breathing shallowly, staring down at his lap. There were still tears pouring down his cheeks but they were almost entirely silent now. Roy was desperate to try and do _something_ , but he felt so awkward and scared that he would do something wrong that he didn't know how. So he did the only thing he could think of, and moved his hand away. 

This seemed to trigger a change. Moss let out a small yell, raising his knees to his chest and burying his face in them, raising his hands over his head as if to protect himself. Roy could hear him sobbing now and it was breaking his heart. Moss' shoulders were still heaving from how heavy his breathing was. 

"Help," he whispered. 

"You're safe," Roy said. He knew that was the only thing he could do right now. He could feel his own heart rate starting to speed up. This was a flashback, he knew it. It was only the second time it had happened like this. Normally when Moss started to get consumed by the memories he would be asleep, and whilst he would wake up in a panic Roy knew how to deal with it. This, somehow, he found infinitely scarier. It sounded awful, but Roy found it easier to deal with when it was only the aftermath. "I'm here for you. I'm not going anywhere."

"Please stop," Moss whimpered. He was too deep in the memory now. 

"Moss, you're here at home with me," the Irishman said. "It’s over. They can’t hurt you anymore."

At that moment, Moss looked up. His cheeks were stained with tears and he looked utterly terrified. 

"I'm sorry," he whispered. 

"You have nothing to apologise for," Roy replied. 

"I'm sorry."

"It was _not_ your fault." 

Moss shook his head. Roy tried his best to give him a reassuring look, but he could feel his own tears welling up now. "I love you," he said. His voice was tight as he tried to swallow down the lump in his throat. "I love you so much, okay? You're safe. I'm safe. We're both completely safe in here. They can't come here." 

"Do you promise?" Moss asked. As Roy watched, he realised that Moss was mimicking his own breathing patterns. Consciously he began to make an effort to breathe more deeply and calmly. Something warm settled in his chest when he saw Moss copy him. 

"Of course," he said. "I'll always keep you safe." 

It took another quarter of an hour or so, but slowly Moss came out of the flashback. It seemed to help when Roy reached over and gently put his glasses back on, like it grounded him being able to see the room around him. 

Once he realised where he was he leaned over, buried his face in his boyfriend's shoulder and began to cry. 

Roy froze for a moment. The only other time this had happened Moss hadn't wanted any contact or attention afterwards, actually asking Roy to leave the room and leave him alone. Clearly this was different. Slowly Roy wrapped his arms around him, holding him close to him. "Hey, you're alright," he said gently. "You're alright." 

Moss didn't stop crying, but he certainly seemed a little calmer. Roy continued to murmur soft reassurances to him and promising him that he was okay. Eventually Moss dropped off to sleep, his breathing evening out as he slipped into a slumber. 

Roy waited until he was sure he was asleep before bending his head and letting his own tears fall. 

**Author's Note:**

> thankyou so much for reading!!! please leave comments and/or kudos if you can, they make me so happy!!! remember, if you want to request a fic for this series head to my tumblr @thatludicrousdisplay and check out my pinned post :)
> 
> stay safe and happy, y'all xx


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